“I am a fake grandma!”

25 October 2025

Interview Marian van Wijk and Sonya El Messari

Marian van Wijk (70) worked as a social worker in Amsterdam until her retirement. Now she is a language buddy for Sonya El Messari through the Amsterdam Neighbouring Women Contact.

Why did you start doing this volunteer work?“I retired, and because I enjoy working with people, including foreigners, this seemed very nice to me. Also, because you visit people’s homes, often mothers with children, I still enjoy being around children. I don’t have grandchildren myself.”How did you get started?“I started six years ago and have already taught an Egyptian, a Greek, an Iraqi, a Syrian, and now a Moroccan woman. I don’t have a language background, but I do have experience with foreign people. It’s about speaking, if you speak Dutch, you can do this volunteer work.”

“Sonya can learn well. And it’s cozy with her, she often bakes cookies that we eat during the lesson.”

How long have you been teaching a woman?“The program normally lasts for a year, but the program with Sonya has been extended due to corona, we are now working on the last ten lessons. You teach from a method, which includes exercises and role plays. Sonya is a good student, she learns well. And it is cozy at Sonya’s, she often bakes cookies that we eat during the lesson.”What do you gain from this volunteer work?“That you see progress, that someone passes their exam. The joy in the contact, also with the children. I am a fake grandma!”Sonya (43) worked in Morocco in a factory where strawberries are frozen and exported. Since 2014, she has been living in Amsterdam with her husband and two children, aged four and six. She took language lessons at the community center and passed her integration exam. Before the pandemic, she volunteered to teach sewing at the community center and served coffee at a nursing home.

How did you end up at Amsterdam Neighbors Contact?“A year and a half ago, a neighbor said, ‘Why don’t you ask for a language buddy through the Amsterdam Neighbor Women Contact? That way you’ll learn Dutch better.'”

“Marian is a grandma to my children”

What is it like to learn the language at home?“Marian is a grandmother to my children. They always ask, is grandma coming today? Marian helps me with speaking, reading, and writing. I find Dutch a difficult language. My children speak it very well! They also teach me how to say things.”How often do you meet up?“Two hours per week, when the children go to school. We started again in August, before that we had stopped due to corona.”What do you think of Marian?“She is a beautiful woman. She feels like family, not like a teacher. I love her very much.”What does it mean to you to receive lessons from Marian?“Taal is very important. I have little contact with Dutch people, I am busy with the children. I do have contact with Dutch neighbors. But I need to practice more!”

Friends at Amsterdam Neighbors Contact

The volunteers of ABC provide language lessons at people’s homes. This sets ABC apart from other language providers. We go behind the front door and provide one-on-one lessons. Learning the Dutch language lowers the threshold for learners to later participate in group Dutch lessons. Through personal contact with the volunteer, confidence in one’s abilities grows.Want to become a buddy? Check outwww.vca.nu/gappie

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